Disciple: Listening for Truth, Praying for Healing

New listening circles offering opens door to addressing #MeToo experiences

By the Rev. Robert Fruehwirth

Following the bold work of the House of Bishops and the 79th General Convention in 2018, both responding to the #MeToo movement, the Rt. Rev. Sam Rodman, bishop of the Diocese of North Carolina, and the Rt. Rev. Anne Hodges-Copple, bishop suffragan of the Diocese of North Carolina, have charged the diocesan Pastoral Response Team to create a process to reckon with the reality of sexual harassment, misconduct and assault in The Episcopal Church. As the bishops wrote in a recent pastoral letter:

As the bishops of the Diocese of North Carolina, we are charged to guard the faith and guide the church in the light of God’s reconciling love. We believe the metaphor of shepherd associated with [the] ordination of bishops indicates we have a call to protect and defend those in our care from all evil, including the misuse of power….

Despite all efforts to the contrary, at times members of our One Body have been wounded by word and deed in body and in spirit by other members of the One Body. Among us are victims of sexual abuse, harassment and misconduct….Harassment of any magnitude, abuse of any kind, leaves wounds, and how such wounds are tended matters to the health of the entire body.

Our diocesan initiative has two distinct processes. First, the bishops have invited the lay leadership and clergy of the diocese to a series of listening circles for those who have suffered from sexual abuse, harassment or misconduct in the Church. Designed with great care and with professional consultation, these listening circles are making space for our church leaders, both lay and clerical, who want to share how their own experience of sexual abuse, harassment or misconduct has impacted their lives.

Second, the Pastoral Response Team is inviting any member of the Church within the Diocese of North Carolina to write a letter describing how their experiences of sexual misconduct in the Church has impacted their lives. As the bishops explained:

These letters will be kept in confidence, shared within a small circle of pastoral care providers, and shared with the bishops, with or without names according to the wishes of the submitter. We will respond pastorally to each letter, which we will begin receiving during Lent.

The objective of receiving such letters is threefold. First, it is important your bishops apprehend and appreciate narratives that describe the impact of abuse and misconduct both at the time and over time. Second, just as was designed at the [79th] General Convention, we will ask some of the letter writers if they would like to have their letters read at the Liturgy of Repentance and Reconciliation. When such letters are read, it will be without names or reference to any particulars that might reveal specific people, places or occasions. Finally, it is our hope that the act of sharing such accounts provides the narrator some small amount of balm that the bishops of the Diocese have heard and share the enduring impact of these wounds.

For more information about this process and how to submit a letter to be read by the bishops and pastoral care providers, please visit http://bit.ly/dionclisteningcircles.

This effort, to have both listening circles and a letter-writing process leading to a Liturgy of Repentance and Healing, is only the start of a process to understand and work pastorally with the wounds in our Church resulting from from sexual abuse, misconduct and harassment. We ask for your prayers.

The Rev. Robert Fruehwirth is the rector of St. Matthew’s, Hillsborough, and a member of the diocesan Pastoral Response Team.